Update 11/5/2012

November 5th, 2012 § 14 comments

A very short update because I have not updated for a while. We were hit by Hurricane Sandy and are still without power after 8 days. We are waiting for a Nor’easter to arrive on Wednesday which may cause further damage. A tree hit the house, fortunately came to rest on the chimney which prevented us from having the tree through the roof. The kids were out of school all week which was challenging since it was my week on chemo. But we got through it. My parents came and rode out the storm with us and I am so grateful for their help. They aren’t married anymore but they really do come together to help me, which is just what the kids and I needed.

We’re waiting for power to return and tomorrow (Tuesday) I will be back at the oncologist’s office (temporarily relocated because a lot of Greenwich is still without power as well). I’ll do bloodwork, meet with my doctor, and then get an IV dose of Zometa to help strengthen my bones and hopefully reduce some of the pain I am still having in my left shoulder from the cancer-caused fracture. I should probably wear a sling to help with the pain but I refuse to do it because I know it will cause so many questions of “What did you do? How did you hurt yourself?” I just don’t want to talk about it.

So many have been affected by this storm. My heart goes out to them.

I have a hard time right now dealing with the fact that once we get through the immediate cleanup from this storm I will still have this blasted cancer. And be dealing with it. Forever. And right now that is something I am having a hard time dealing with.

I do as much as I can each day to be normal… I went to the laundromat during the power outage. I did the grocery shopping today. I play Yahtzee and give snuggles. I don’t have energy to do as much as I want. I still ask for help. I have friends who’ve offered so much assistance and I am grateful. I am loved and I know it… I just am working through the mental anguish of this diagnosis.

I long for problems that can be fixed. I long for problems that have solutions.

 

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