“Two Cents” was one of the first things I wrote for the blog. I don’t know if it’s poetry or a rant or what. I distinctly remember writing it: I scribbled it down on the back of a brown paper sleeve from a Starbucks donut as I waited for Paige to finish her piano lesson one sunny day several years ago. I’m quite sure the impetus was being told that “things happen for a reason.” I still find this one simple, but true. Many readers still have a soft spot for this early piece in which I provide my own two cents’ worth.
Don’t tell me things happen for a reason.
Don’t tell me there is a plan.
Don’t tell me I’m supposed to learn a lesson from this.
Don’t tell me I’m a better person for it.
Tell me I’m strong.
Tell me I’m tough.
Tell me I did it well.
Tell me you care.
I don’t believe I was given cancer for a reason.
I don’t believe there is a master plan.
I don’t believe this is a test.
I don’t believe you only are given what you can handle.
I know I will learn lessons.
I know I will be stronger.
I know sometimes it is too much to handle.
I know sometimes I want to give up.
I know sometimes I thought dying would be easier.
I believe the power is in me.
I believe the power is in my doctors.
I believe in the power of medical science.
I believe unless you have experienced this, you cannot know.
I believe unless you’ve been there, you cannot give advice.
I believe unless you’ve felt it, you cannot judge.
I believe in the power of friendship and love to make the journey bearable.
I believe suffering is a process.
I believe in picking myself up and pressing forward.
I believe persistence pays off.
I believe in enjoying the gifts I’ve been given.
I believe many people will never understand.
It might sadden me, anger me, and frustrate me.
But in the end that does not matter.
I can only be true to myself.
I must be true to myself.