In these last remaining hours
Before my children disappear
One,
Two,
Three…
In these last remaining hours before they go and spread their wings again,
Leave this nest,
I miss them already.
I put the dinner pots and pans away.
Wipe the crumbs from the table,
Load the dishwasher,
Play fetch with the dog.
I sit in the garden,
Listen to the wind in the trees,
The birds settling down before nightfall,
As we settle, too.
I tuck them in one last time,
Hear their doors click shut.
One,
Two,
Three.
Tomorrow night there will be no mess to clean,
No yelling upstairs that the TV has been left on again,
No trunks piled high with carefully labeled belongings in the dining room.
I will cry, I know.
Not because I am sad that they are going– no, that gives me great joy.
Children being children.
Forgetting stress at home and doing new and varied things.
I cheer their independence.
I will cry because I know they will always need me somehow and I just wish I could be there for them to outgrow
by choice,
by time,
by age.
I hear the mother bird in the tree calling out.
I don’t know to whom.
I will be like that tomorrow,
calling out,
with no child to hear.
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Oh, another soul touching post. So very beautiful. My sincerest hope for you is to be here to experience that normal, time honored separation between teen and parent, and will still be here to enjoy that time when those same children come back to the nest, realizing it is their soft safe place to fall.
I like what Lisa said about being there when they come back.
It’s nice that you and your husband will have some time for just the two of you, and the kids will get to go and be kids. Still it must be hard to let them go, even for a short while.
As always, a beautiful post. How lucky your children are to have you. And how they will cherish your words forever.
How beautifully stated….our children, our loves…..we do not know if we will leave them or if they will leave us….the only thing that matters is the love between us and that will be forever. We wish them to grow and develop and experience. Sounds simple but takes great courage.
I wish that for you too, Lisa. Hugs.
Lisa, I just finished a wonderful book. WONDERFUL. It made me feel a bit better about my MBC diagnosis. It is called “Until I say Goodbye: my Year of Living with Joy by
Susan Spencer-Wendel. She is 44 years old and has three young children. She has ALS.
I don’t know exactly why I feel better but I do. She made me realize we are dealt certain cards in life and there is NOTHING we can do about it.
This is an absolutely beautiful poem. I love, love, love it. You are always in my thoughts, every day and all day.
Be Well~
Take the time to enjoy yourself, your husband, your friends. xoxo
This is beautiful. xo
It’s going to be different this year with Tristan going. You are such a great mom to give them this experience to leave home for a little while and have their own unique adventures. They all know you are right there waiting for them. If you can, try to enjoy the time to yourself. They will all be home soon enough yelling that the TV was left on. Beautiful post from a beautiful mom.
Your words are so hauntingly beautiful. Sometimes, they are so hard to read, especially when going through the motions of my own life and then thinking how painfully magnified the every day things are for you.
It hurts my heart for you.
Make the best use for YOU while they are away having the best experiences that summer time offers.
I love the way you feel all your feelings. And lucky for us you express them so well. Thankfully, feelings are constantly changing – like clouds. Wishing you some silver linings.
Take care,
Kim
Beautiful. We hope the kids have a fabulous time at camp enjoying each and every moment!
I am so moved by your words: “I will cry because I know they will always need me somehow and I just wish I could be there for them to outgrow by choice, by time, by age.” It is the wish all we mothers share but as a daughter, albeit now 47, I will always “need” my parents. My father having passed four years ago form lung cancer I find I miss him more not less as the years go by without him. Thank you Lisa for sharing your feelings and thoughts and for putting it so eloquently.