Today is Memorial Day. Each year my letter to troops stationed overseas is similar. Each year I question whether I should write something new, if it’s “cheating” to say the same thing. In the end I realize that thank you never gets old, it never needs to be re-written. Thank you doesn’t have an expiration date.
This year we went to buy items for the care package drive sponsored by the Darien Little League. Volunteers collect supplies including toiletries, non-perishable food, and games and send them to soldiers far from home.
My letters always have the same theme: bravery– chance or choice? I don’t know if the soldiers find my musing on this distinction weird in a letter, but they must ponder the topic of bravery as often as I do.
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May 27, 2013
Dear Servicemen/women,
My family and I are sending you some supplies on this Memorial Day Weekend. We want you to know that we have not forgotten you or the sacrifice you are making every day to be away from your own families and in harm’s way. It’s not much, but perhaps knowing you are in our hearts and minds will help.
Six years ago I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I was in remission for more than five years and now my cancer has metastasized to my bones and lymph nodes. It’s not curable. As I go through treatment, people called me brave. I don’t think I deserve it. “Brave” is not a word you used about someone like me. I have gotten cancer by chance and I am dealing with it, the best I can.
But soldiers? You are brave. You have a choice—you put your lives on the line after making a conscious decision to do so. You know the danger and you do it anyway. To me, that is true bravery, true heroism.
Seeing danger and making the choice to proceed anyway is precisely how I define bravery. We all find ways to deal with the fear of death. We know the uncertainty that lies ahead. We see the bravery in others before we will see it in ourselves.
What underlies bravery: chance or choice? Can both?
Are we just hesitant to see the quality in ourselves? Are we just modest? Do we just act the way we need to, to get the job done?
I think when you choose to throw your hat in the ring, that choice counts for something.
That makes you brave.
That’s what makes soldiers heroes.
Happy Memorial Day to you. And thank you for your continued service to our country.
Lisa Bonchek Adams
Link to Twitter
Hope you submitted this one to Huff Post and NYT. It is beyond fabulous.
I define bravery by how strong a person is when facing adversity. I consider you to be one of the bravest people I know. I am sure your many followers would agree.
David
Bravery comes in many forms. You are not less brave because you did not “choose” cancer. You are brave because of the way you do choose every single day how to deal with it, and the way you share with your readers your difficult journey.
a big thank you for you, on this special day.
awesome
It’s not the diagnosis but how we deal with it each day. And you continue to do so in a courageous way.
I totally agree with David.
Beautifully written post, Lisa. Thank you as always.
You writing touches my soul. Sharing your life with us is a “choice” and that makes you brave.
Many blessings
Well said, Lisa. I don’t think of myself as brave, given that I had no choice in getting Stage IV cancer. But the soldier heroes are truly brave souls, choosing to protect our freedoms in the face of grave danger. xo
This is a wonderful letter, Lisa. I still believe you are a very brave person.
As usual, Lisa, you take my breath away. Beautifully said. xox
I will speak for myself too. You ARE brave to me, and I regard your beautiful thoughts with great admiration.
Good one